MAY 16th, 2010 - posted by Sandy (aka Great-Granny Grandma)

"...it is God who works in you both to
will and to do for His good pleasure."
(Philippians 2:13)

Well, I'm back after a somewhat lengthy absence during which I felt like a hypocrite and deleted all my posts to this blog.  My story, if I shared it, would be practically verbatim to Angie's confessional in her last post, so I'll spare you the details --except one.

I keep doing (and not doing) the same things over and over and expecting different results.  Does anyone else relate to that? 

Today I enter the battlefield once again, and take comfort in the above Scriptute.  Today I give up trying to do this in my own strength and turn it over to the Lord.  Today my prayer is, Lord, please give me the willingness and commitment to get rid of this idol (food) in my life and start honoring you with the way I treat my body.  Amen!

Me too . . .

I think I have lost and gained the same four pounds half a dozen times over these past weeks. I have no excuse. I haven't been listening to my cd every morning, or paying attention to what I am eating like I should be. I have been overly distracted by my other problems, health and otherwise. I need to give myself a good kick in the pants as well. I tell myself every morning, today I am going to do better and then I don't. I have been trying to take long walks every day though, which hasn't been easy. I have been told I probably have Pagets Disease. I am experiencing an incredible amount of pain in my right hip, knee, thigh, ankle, etc. In short all the way from my lower back down to my ankle and all on the right hand side of my body. I wish Margaret was here . . . We have really been through the mill during these past few months and we still have a few hardships to go through yet. Things are pretty bad financially at the moment. I need to start writing everything down again and tracking what I am eating and why, and listening to my cd's again. I haven't actually put any weight on, what with taking it off again, but I haven't lost any further than I was several months ago. This could be disheartening, but in the light of all I have been through I guess it's not too bad. I don't want to stick here though. I want the scales to start moving down again.

Friday 14th May

Sorry, but I have to use this blog a bit like a confessional today  .............."forgive me readers for I have sinned"............

I have put on weight like it's going out of fashion!  I can only blame myself because at the end of the day it's me who puts the food in my mouth.

I have stopped listening to my body and eating only when I reach a certain state of hunger

I have omitted to stop eating when I'm pleasantly full.  It's easy enough to do this by only giving myself a small portion on a small plate and having seconds if I really need.  I know I'm much more likely to stop eating this way because I'm too flipping idle to go fetch any more.

I have been baking all sorts of goodies and helping to make sure they  don't go to waste!

In short, I have sat here getting fat.  I don't like it, I'm doing myself no favours and I need a quick kick up the bum!  Now. 






Well - this is a good start

Just a last few words before I move

The scales are packed and we are on our way. I won't have any internet access until a few days after we get settled in at the other end. This has been a rough ride. I won't kid you. I have not lost any weight, but neither have I gained any. The past few weeks have just been very unsettled and I have not gotten in a lot of exercise, unless of course you count wrapping and packing. Things will get back on track once we have settled. Wish me luck!! xxoo

Still losing

I've been through the most incredibly tumultuous couple of weeks, but I'm happy to report that I am still losing. I weighed myself just prior to having a bath last night (very abnormal for me as I usually weigh myself first thing in the morning) and I was down another 2 pounds, so that is good.

It's not easy to lose your home and your job all together. It is a very, very scary place to be. In days gone by, I probably would have soothed myself by eating everything in sight, again and again. I am happy to report that so far this just hasn't happened.

I was a bit worried that I would have put on weight after having spent a week in Chester looking for a new place to live. All we had to eat when we were there was fast food, mostly from McDonalds, cos it's the cheapest place to eat . . . although to be honest, I tried to choose the healthiest options that I could. We did do an ultra amount of walking though, so that probably helped a lot to keep things moving in the right direction!

Now we are super busy sorting through everything and getting our things ready to move. Things are still quite uncertain as I have not heard from my employer at all, except a brief phone call from his PA to tell me that I didn't need to go into work again and to get on with sorting ourselves out. He had told us that if we needed any help to let him know, but Todd's e-mail doing just that has been totally ignored, and not even acknowledged.

This is just so wrong. I know that I am entitled to redundancy pay, so hopefully that will be forthcoming . . . but when being made redundant also means you lose the very roof over your head . . . we feel that we are at least entitled to relocation costs as well. We shall see what happens . . . but whatever it is, I hope it happens soon, as we are getting down to the crunch here. There are only 2 1/2 weeks left before we need to be out of this house.

Your ongoing prayers and happy thoughts would be very much appreciated!!

I'm feeling a bit down

I've just been made reduntant. That means I am losing my job and my home and they want us to move out asap. My head is spinning. I never slept a wink last night and I am just shaking. Could y'all share prayer for me. Thanks. I've been told I will have an excellent reference as I am an excellent cook, but they will no longer require the services of a cook, and in fact they are planning on either selling our cottage or renting it out. I think devastated is the word that covers how I am feeling right now.

What a week!!

I have just had the craziest week ever. It's been really wierd. Some really crazy stuff has gone down at work and I find myself in a really scary place. My employers have separated, right out of the blue and I am now very uncertain as to my future. The husband walked out last Thursday without telling anyone and when his wife got home from her latest trip, a note was waiting for her on the bed. When I went to go into work that night, she told me to go home, I was not needed and not to come in again until I was told. I have gone back once this week, to do something for her as she is leaving for America tomorrow, but I had to go in when she wasn't there. I guess this is one of the down sides of working as a chef for a family and living where you work . . . I am now wondering if at the end of this month I will still have a job or a place to live. Very uncertain.

Happy to say though that I am sticking with my good eating habits. Only eating when hungry and only until satisfied. I haven't been as good as I should about writing everything down. I really need to get with it . . . and I need to be drinking more water. Down 2 more pounds.

I keep waiting for it to stop working. I wonder if this is normal. I suppose that having been on so many diets in the past 20 years and having failed at dieting for 20 years, it is normal to be a little afraid in that way.

We have gone walking a few times over the past week. I wish I had a wii fit. My boss tried to tell me that I should get our dog to give me one for Christmas. She said you should always let the dog buy you a pressie for Christmas. Somehow I don't think that one would wash with my husband!! I think I will have to earn it.

We have booked our tickets to go home to Canada in July and so now the pressure is on to really look good for then!

I guess that's all that is new. Will keep you all posted as to what happens next!! ☺